it's like towards the end of my prelims. and i feel like just giving up right now. i can't stand it. the thought that Os is nearing is starting to freak me out! especially that i'm not prepared and i know i can't make it to SAJC. so no point trying to tempt me to get in. it just won't work. my dream to SHATEC may come true. ok. maybe my dream to TP for tourism course may come true or SP's business course. or biotech. forget it.
had a super bad tummyache. i was battling between life and death. i could have chose to meet my death right? nahs. there's many more things in life which i haven't done. like going venice, or rome. doing bungee jump, having my perfect wedding with my dream guy. and of course, my dream job and a wonderful family. but i guess.... out of all, many won't come true. no point lying to myself that it will come true, right?
going out with sis on tuesday for a movie. yaps. i miss hanging out with her. it's great having her at home. and i'm glad she's not staying in her hostel. ^^
currently looking for a job. ask my mum to ask her collegues if there's a job for me at any hotel. best if it's at front desk. hahas. then i guess, half my dream come true. lols. i'll probably still apply for the event company thingy. yaps.
hmms. tml is maths and physcis paper. i'm not expecting much from maths, so there goes my A. erms. physics? maybe i can try. forget about going first 3 months. NO FATE with JC. ><
hmm. i feel as if i'm back to sec 3 life. so what's the point of studying so much and working so hard. what's my freaking point?! 29,28,29,35! what the fuck. you think i feel good getting all these results? and when i get home, i have to hear all the naggings?! i don't! I SWEAR I DON'T FEEL GOOD! i have deams too. i want to be a successful person to. do i look as if i don't want to have a good future? do i look as if i'm not putting in all my effort? stop comparing me others! stop telling me how well others had done. i don't give a damn. stop telling me what i should do. i know! argh! GIVE ME A FREAKING BREAK!
i know i'm not as smart as they are. i know i'm not as talented as they are. but this is me. and this is the way i am. if you don't like it, or if you don't want me, just get me out of your life. it settles all. just one line "get lost!", and i'll disappear from your life forever. just one line, and i'll be gone from this world for life and for good.i bet you won't even shed a tear or you won't even feel sad. cause i'm nothing to you. NOTHING! what's the point of me living in this world with no one who care about me? what's the point of making me so miserable when you know i hate it. this is me, like it or not!
forget about it! this life just sucks at time. who would ever want to step into it? it's just a complicated one. ahhs!
i'm sorry for if i offend anyone for writing this entry. but if you really don't like whatever i write, go my tag, type your unhappiness, PLEASE, write your real name. and if you feel that i ought to get a very bad scolding, tell it right into my face. if not, just diam and get out of this place. get out your ass out of this blog!
done blogging.
-you think i'm happy at where i am now?-
♥ the world will turn WILD.
9:05 PM
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